come he told her gently
and reached out for her hand
follow in my footsteps
we’ll reach that magic land
where all the elves are feisty
and Santa mighty pissed
the reindeer are all bolshie
and Rudolph’s sorely missed
he went out for a tinkle
we told him don’t be long
but he has not returned yet
which buggers up the song
so Donner’s wearing greasepaint
and Blitzen a false nose
but neither one is working
so Santa can’t use those
the toy shop has been burnt down
destroying all the toys
but at least there is no shortage
of coal for naughty boys
and Santa won’t stop drinking
he’s on his second crate
so sadly we must tell you
this year Christmas is late

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  1. damommza

     /  December 24, 2014

    I couldn’t love this more if I wrote it myself! πŸ˜† πŸ˜† πŸ˜†

  2. Since I’m Santa the single mom for my household and my dad’s and I’m always feeling overwhelmed, esp. with all sorts of year end deadline requirements to interfere with our holly days— I’m feeling much this way myself! I wish I could declare that Christmas will be late, but one of my sons is only here for 72 hours, I can’t do that… Bah humbug! I’m with your Santa on this one…


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